the art of mindbending

the life of zooey who happens to be Bipolar 2

watch your six

I listen to books on tape as I commute to work each day. They provide two things for me, entertainment and no road rage. Yes, I was a real baddy in the latter. I am not allowed to listen to ANY scary stuff. I speed and miss my exits. Mostly they are mysteries, fantasies an the like. They’ve included George R.R. Martin, Kevin Hearne and a slew of female authors like Patricia Briggs, Janet Evanovich, Diane Galbaldon, Darynda Jones and J.D. Robb. If you are familiar with any of these writers, you know they write series. I love series. I binge listen to series and have the same withdrawal after catching up.

J.D. Robb is a favorite for her ‘In Death series. It centers around Eve Dallas, a female cop set in a plausible futuristic New York. The story reader is awesome. The characters are funny, fairly complex and interesting. There are a lot characters and story lines, but the books are never confusing. It’s a real treat when the next one comes out.

_1144-This morning, one of the characters says to Eve, “Watch your six.” Not being a part of the military, I had to google it.

Watch your six: This idiom means that you should look behind you for dangers coming that you can’t see. Watching one’s six is watching the direction of six o’clock considering that twelve o’clock is right in front of you.

Apparently I need to watch my six.

fruit basketsI’ve been promoted at work. It’s been fruit basket upset between managers. Due to layoffs and those voluntarily leaving, my director moved my manager to another area of our department and put me in charge of the very peers I’ve worked with for the past few years.

My former manager is not happy.

She showed it on many occasions.

She didn’t take the high road.

Yesterday there was a ‘frank’ discussion on how awkward she felt. “It’s like breaking up with your boyfriend and having your friend date them right in front of you.” She pressed in on HOW I should manage HER team. She talked of what people were saying / gossiping about that my director was tight with me. That may director brought me into the group to take over the group. This implied I did not earn this promotion. That people were upset in the group I would manage saying they should have been considered. The message was loud and clear. She didn’t think I fairly got the promotion. She implied I would not be successful. She clearly didn’t want to take on something new after 8 years.

Fuck that.

Fucking grow up, lady.

For the record, I am close to my director. Not socially, but professionally. She was my manager for many years prior. I’ve had two other managers before moving back to this department.  I helped her learn our departmental space. She has acted as my informal mentor when I did not report to her, giving me advice. But not once have I asked for special treatment. Not once have I taken advantage of the relationship. Not once did I come to her gunning for a manager position. This was her decision. It came out of the blue. I was ready to move on to something else.

I left with a very sour taste in my mouth and stewed about it almost all the way home. About 20 minutes into my commute this now former manger calls me on the phone, recanting all she said. Saying that I need to manage my way. She was all flowers and sunshine. I have no idea what turned it around. My inkling is that when she mentioned it on a call to another manager and he gave her a reality check.


c8a4a2c81eb4ed35ecb975004c4c2d51I was told once in a speech class that not reacting to someone getting all steamed put you at an advantage. Yes, instinct says be that way back to them. I refrained. I kept my anger in check.

I can let that go, but I am not forgetting. I have no trust in her motives. What fucking goes around, comes around.

Eyes in the back of my head,





3 comments on “watch your six

  1. Rory
    December 4, 2015

    Ouch. A few thoughts. 1) You’re an amazing leader. I’ve seen it many times. 2) You seem to have handled that well. I wasn’t there, but I’ve seen you handle idiots before, and I’m confident you did well. 3) The high road pays for itself. Good on you. 4) Silence is 90% of power in a hard discussion. Neutral face, calm body language, silence. They will spill. They will say something they didn’t mean to. It’s awesome.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. zooey
    December 4, 2015

    My mom taught me a lot about neutrality and silence as great tools. Former boss panicked and called me back. She was happy and chatty, checking my temperature the next morning. You see, I also had a one on one with my new director/her boss as well. My hip waders are way longer than hers. The way I approached it with my director kept her out of the fray but gave the new boss an inkling and now she will watch. I’ll let the rest do its thing.


  3. Rory
    December 4, 2015

    Thumbs up to your mom! Also, thumbs up to you! Rock the high road, girl!

    Liked by 1 person

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